In the beginning, you weren’t thinking about the end. Beyond the blur of wedding bells, rings, and gifts, the future was bright; full of hope and possibility. Sure, the details weren’t filled in, yet, but the important parts were: the picture of both of you, together, taking on the world.
Now you’re sitting here staring at the ruins of your relationship, wondering what went wrong, and what you’re even supposed to do to prepare for divorce.
The good news is, that—while dealing with divorce might feel impossible in the moment—the future is still bright. Beyond this dark tunnel, the rest of your life waits, and the Maples Family Law team is here to help you get there.
Start Your Divorce: First Steps
Divorce is stressful, there’s no doubt, but it is manageable. And before you allow yourself to get too overwhelmed, take a step back to relax, breathe deep, and keep reading for five simple steps you can take to start your divorce in California.
Regardless what type of divorce you decide to try, all of them are going to need the same personal information from you. So, while you’re deciding which attorney to hire, or whether or not legal separation is the preferable alternative, simplify your divorce, by gathering the needed documents right now.
The names and birthdays of any children you share.
As part of your split, the court will be dividing all marital property between the two of you. Hence, if there’s anything that belongs to you as separate property, you should also make sure you have the necessary proof to support your claims.
Keep in mind that—in addition to being illegal—it’s also extremely difficult to hide assets during divorce. Courts don’t look kindly on this, so it’s best not to try.
3. File a Petition
A divorce doesn’t officially kick off until you file a petition. This document essentially notifies the court of your intent to break your marriage contract, and requests they submit a final ruling.
You or your attorney will need to pick up the divorce petition form at your local courthouse. To fill it out, you will need a lot of the information you gathered in the previous step. Once complete, your or your attorney can return it (and all supporting documents) to your clerk.
Once you’ve filed your petition, the next step is to notify your spouse that you’ve initiated a divorce. While you might be tempted to just send a simple text, California law requiresproper service. This involves having an outside party hand-deliver divorce papers.
After receiving papers, your spouse will have thirty days to respond to your petition, giving you a short respite. However, even if they respond sooner, you still won’t be able to get a quick divorce.
5. Prepare to Wait
You and your spouse might be certain about your split, but California courts need a little more convincing.
Humans beings are emotional, rash creatures, and we aren’t always at our best in the heat of an argument. Because of that, all divorcing couples must endure a mandatory, six-month waiting period, before the court will hear their case.
Try not to think of this as a punishment, but as a way to be absolutely sure that divorce is right for you. You can also utilize the time to engage in any discovery needed for your hearing, and to help the rest of your family prepare for the upcoming changes.
Start Your Divorce: Helping a Child Cope
Of course, knowing the technical steps of how to start your divorce is one thing, but dealing with emotions is an entirely different matter. Especially when it comes to parents and young children.
At Maples Family Law, we understand the concerns parents face—how you worry about custody, child support, and the negative impact a hypothetical divorce might have on your child. You carry the heavy burden of trying not to project your emotions onto your child, all the while it feels like a bomb just went off inside your chest.
It’s no wonder you’re stressed.
However, when it comes to your kids, it’s probably not as bad as you might think. Here are a few things for worried parents to keep in mind, when starting a divorce.
Your Child’s Interests Are Guiding the Decisions
The state of California is worried about your family, too, and easing the impact of divorce on your child is one of their top priorities.
When making decisions that affect minors, your judge will put the best interest of your child above all other considerations.
The Right Team Matters
There is no “I” in “Team,” and when it comes to divorce, it can be hard to see the playing field without the right perspective. This is why hiring the right child custody attorney is so important.
Reach a dynamic parenting plan that meets your family’s unique needs; and,
Develop an effective co-parenting strategy, that will help your child adjust your family’s new normal as smoothly as possible.
Help is Available
Children are amazingly resilient. Most of the time they bounce back from these emotional heartbreaks much better than even the adults do.
That being said, it doesn’t hurt to give them an outlet to work through emotions, or let them talk to atherapist. Extra help is always available, and you don’t have to do this alone.
Divorce Attorneys in California
For more questions about how to start your divorce, call the team at Maples Family Law at (209) 989-4425, or get in touch online. While divorce might be an end, it’s also a beginning—the start of the rest of your life—and it’s one we want to help you reach.
If you’ve never experienced it before, divorce can be an intimidating process. Between filing the correct forms, locating documents, and keeping track of deadlines, there’s a lot to remember, and, without help, the journey can quickly become overwhelming.
To help you out, this article will walk you through the basic steps of how to get a divorce in California, and how the lawyers at Maples Family Law can make this process easier for you.
Residency Requirements
If you want a divorce, one of the first things you’ll need to do is make sure you meet the residency requirements at both the state and county levels.
In order to file in California, you will need to have lived in the state for at least 6 months. For residents of San Joaquin county, the requirement is three.
If you’ve fallen short in either of these categories, you don’t need to worry. There is a lot of busy work that needs to happen before you file, anyway. While you wait, discuss your situation with a family law attorney, who can make sure you have all the necessary information on hand to hit the ground rolling.
Important Dates
Regardless of what documents are required for your, individual case, two important dates you will certainly need are your: 1) date of marriage; and, 2) date of separation.
These dates are important, because they’re used to help determine your interests in marital property.
California is a community property state. This means that all assets acquired after marriage belong to both of you equally—regardless of whose name is on the paycheck, account, or card. Unless you have a valid prenup saying otherwise, this shared interest continues up until the time of separation.
Determining your date of separation is much simpler, if you and your spouse had a legal separation. Those couples who didn’t make separation official will need to comb through emails, texts, and other informal documents to prove this date to a judge.
Immediate Orders
Another thing to consider before filing, is whether or not you’ll need a temporary order.
Temporary orders are provisional (meaning, they have a set expiration date), and can be used to prohibit certain behaviors or dictate responsibilities while your divorce is pending.
These can be tailored to meet your individual needs, but are often used to:
Outline living arrangements and the bill-paying responsibilities of each spouse.
Temporary orders can be especially useful for those who might be worried about spousal retaliation. In these scenarios, a temporary order can prohibit your spouse from emptying bank accounts, destroying property, and fleeing across state lines with your children.
If you are experiencing abuse or domestic violence of any kind, remember that keeping yourself and your children safe is paramount to everything else.
File Documents
After your paperwork is complete, you will need to take your documents to your local family court to file them, and to pay the associated fees. In California, the filing fee for an original petition of divorce is $435.
If you are trying to execute a D.I.Y. divorce, this fee will be your responsibility. Those who utilize an attorney, however, do not need to worry about these technicalities. When you hire a lawyer, they are in charge of making sure all the necessary paperwork is filed on time, and that fees are paid (the amounts of which will be deducted from your retainer).
Serve Your Spouse
Once divorce has been initiated, the next step is to notify your spouse—and this cannot be done with a simple phone call or text message. Proper notification (or “service,” as is the legal term), is done by giving physical copies of all paperwork to your spouse, in person.
As a party to the case, however, you are not allowed to serve divorce papers on your spouse. Other than that, though, the requirements are pretty open, meaning it’s usually not necessary to hire a professional process server.
For service to be proper in California, your server must be:
Deliver the Proof of Service to you, so that your attorney can file it with the court.
Failing to complete proper service could put your case in danger of dismissal.
If you are unable to meet the sixty-day timeframe, your attorney can request more time. This extension is often needed by spouses who have been abandoned, and don’t know how to locate their partner. In these situations, the court will sometimes make an exception to in-person delivery, and allow you to utilize another method of service.
Waiting for a Response
Assuming you have executed proper service, your spouse will then have thirty days to respond to your petition. To this end, their options are:
True Default—do nothing, by not engaging or responding to your petition at all;
Uncontested Divorce—do nothing, because you already have a written, notarized agreement outlining your terms;
Respond in Agreement—file a response with the court, confirming agreement with your proposed terms; or,
Respond in Disagreement—file a response with the court contesting your proposed terms.
It is almost never a good idea to allow your case to default—even if you do not want the divorce to happen. Refusing to engage will not stall out proceedings. Instead, the court will simply grant the divorce as though you had agreed to all the terms.
Needless to say, this is almost never in your best interest.
During this thirty-day period, you and your spouse are also free to work out a settlement—either between yourselves, or through mediation. If successful, you can submit a marital settlement agreement with the court, which will then become your official divorce order.
When Issues Can’t Be Resolved
Those who are unable to reach an agreement must engage in litigation.
Divorce litigation is a traditional court trial, where both sides are represented by an attorney, evidence is presented, and the issues are decided by a judge. Litigation is by far the most expensive, time-consuming, and least flexible way to secure a divorce. So it’s usually a good idea to at least try to settle, before proceeding to trial.
Single Status
If you are planning to remarry after your divorce, keep in mind that in California, you are not considered to have reached “single status” until six months and one day from the time of service.
If your divorce has not been finalized within this time, you can file a Single Status Affidavit with the court, which will allow you to proceed, in lieu of a final judgment.
Naturally, you are not automatically divorced, just because six months have passed. In all cases, you will still need to either resolve issues amicably with your spouse, or through the court.
Divorce Lawyers in California
Divorce isn’t simple, which is why so many people choose to hire personal representation. Armed with education and experience, an attorney can guide you around major pitfalls, handle tedious paperwork, and ensure your best interests are being protected at all times. Freeing up your mental energy, so that you can channel it where it’s needed most: your family.
If you have more questions about Divorce in California, and how this process might apply to your situation, we want to hear from you. Call us at (209) 989-4425, or get in touch online, and let the team at Maples Family Law help make this process a little easier for you.
We live in a community property state, which means the things you acquired during your marriage belong to both you and your spouse. But what is community property in California, and how will it impact your divorce settlement?
Here’s what you need to know.
What is Community Property in California?
Figuring out property division can be incredibly difficult, and when a couple has many assets or debts, it’s often necessary to hire professional help. However, in order to understand property division, you have to know what the term “property” means when it comes to divorce.
Property is anything that can be bought or sold, or that has value. Examples of property include:
Houses
Vehicles
Furniture
Clothing
Bank accounts and cash
Pension plans and 401(k) plans
Stocks
Life insurance that has cash value
Businesses
Patents
If you acquired any of these things while you were married, they’re usually considered community property. That means they belong to both you and your spouse – even if only one of you made it happen.
For example, if you bought a house a year into your marriage, the law considers it community property. That’s true even if only your name (or only your spouse’s name) is on it. Likewise, if you bought a car, invested money in stocks or even started a business, you have community property.
You and your spouse are free to come up with your own agreements on dividing community property. You might trade one thing for another, or you might choose to each keep things that primarily belong to one of you (such as your own vehicles).
If you arrange trades, you might offer your spouse the china cabinet you purchased in exchange for the dresser in your bedroom. Perhaps you and your spouse agree that one of you gets the sofa and one of you gets the bar stools and dining table.
What About High-Value Assets and Businesses?
In some cases, particularly when it comes to high-value property (like a business), one spouse offers to “buy out” the other. For example, if you opened a candle shop in downtown Stockton while you were married, you’d probably hire a valuation expert to find out how much it’s worth. When the valuation expert gives you a dollar figure – say $150,000 – one spouse might offer to pay the other $75,000 to give up any control of the business.
What if You Don’t Have Cash Lying Around?
Sometimes these buyouts occur without actual cash changing hands. The buying spouse may offer the other spouse items of an equal value, such as a house or a vehicle in trade. As long as the judge agrees that it’s a fair trade, and provided that you both agree to it, the trade can become part of your divorce settlement.
What if You And Your Spouse Can’t Divide Your Community Property?
Community property, in California (and many other states), must be divided fairly. Fair doesn’t always mean 50-xdr50. The judge in your case can take several other factors into account when determining what’s fair, such as whether one spouse earns a lot more money than the other does.
But if you and your spouse can’t agree on dividing your property, your attorney might suggest that you work with a mediator. A mediator is an impartial third party who can help you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse find solutions you can both live with.
If you’re able to eventually reach an agreement, the judge will determine whether it’s fair to both parties. In the event that the judge finds it fair, it’ll become part of your divorce settlement.
Do You Need to Talk to a Lawyer About Community Property in California?
If you’re not sure how to divide your property, or if you need help negotiating a fair settlement, we’re here for you. Call us at (209) 395-1605 to schedule your consultation today.
If you’re like most people, you want your divorce to go as smoothly as possible. You’d like to minimize conflict and just make it through with your head above water – and that’s probably true whether you’re just starting to think about a split or you’re riding out California’s 6-month divorce waiting period. The good news: There are three ways you can simplify your divorce right now.
3 Ways to Simplify Your Divorce (Even Before You File)
Check out these three ways you can simplify your divorce:
Get ready to cooperate.
Organize everything.
Start negotiating as early as possible.
Here’s a closer look at each.
#1. Get Ready to Cooperate
You don’t have to get along with your spouse. You don’t even have to spend time in the same room together or have lengthy discussions over the phone.
However, you do need to prepare yourself – and ask your spouse to prepare him- or herself – to cooperate with each other throughout the process.
Cooperating means working together to achieve an outcome you can both live with. It also means co-parenting your children so that they have as much stability and continuity as possible during (and after) your divorce.
If you and your spouse are having a hard time seeing eye-to-eye, your attorney might suggest that you work with a mediator. A mediator is an impartial third party whose sole job is to find common ground. You can mediate every issue in your divorce, from child custody to property division.
Sometimes it’s not possible to cooperate with your spouse, and that’s okay. Some people are naturally combative and won’t budge. If that’s the case, don’t worry. Your Stockton divorce lawyer can still do what it takes to get you the best possible outcome.
Gather all your important documents and keep them together to simplify your divorce. You may need things like:
Tax returns
Children’s birth certificates
Social Security numbers
Insurance policies
Bank statements
Pay stubs
Credit card statements
Mortgage documents
Business-related documents
Pension or retirement account statements
Your attorney may need these types of documents throughout your divorce, so if you have everything organized, they’ll be easy to find when the time comes.
You don’t have to keep a paper file folder with this information in it. Instead, you can keep digital copies on your computer or in the cloud. Remember, though, when you have all your documents together, you should take steps to protect them. That might include putting them in a safe (if they’re physical copies) or putting them in a password-protected file on your computer.
You may not feel like negotiating with your spouse, but it’s very important that you try if you want to simplify your divorce. Before you head into negotiations with your spouse, decide what you’ll be okay with – and what you can give up to get what you want.
Commit to choosing your battles. You don’t have to fight for things you don’t want just for the sake of “winning.” A successful divorce is one in which you walk away reasonably satisfied with the outcome.
Incidentally, that’s how a lot of people – even those who don’t want to fight – view divorce. It’s not a win-or-lose battle. It’s the dissolution of a marriage in which both parties need to come away with some concessions. In fact, it’s a lot like a business transaction.
The bottom line is that it’s mentally healthier for you to keep your divorce as simple as possible. By extension, it’s better for your children, too. You’ll be less stressed and better equipped to make sound decisions that affect your future.
Are You Ready to Simplify Your Divorce?
If you’re thinking about divorce, or if your spouse has already filed, we may be able to help you. We want you to be able to simplify your divorce, and we’ll do what it takes to get you the best possible outcome.
Call us at (209) 395-1605 for a divorce case evaluation. You’ll talk to an experienced Stockton divorce lawyer who can give you the advice you need to begin moving forward.
If you’re like many women, the thought of divorce has crossed your mind from time to time – and you’re still sitting on the fence about whether it’s the right choice for you, your children, and even your spouse. When you’re considering a split from your partner, you need specific divorce advice for women… that way, you can make the most informed decision possible.
Divorce Advice for Women: 15 Things Most People Won’t Tell You
Check out these 15 pieces of divorce advice for women while you’re evaluating your options:
Make sure you’re really ready for divorce.
Talk to a therapist.
Take your kids to a therapist.
Get all the information you can.
Set goals.
Shore up your support network.
Commit to putting your children first.
Get copies of all your financial documents.
Decide to negotiate with your spouse.
Keep your eye on the “big picture.”
Foster a good relationship between your kids and their other parent.
Look at divorce like a business transaction.
Don’t get divorce advice from Facebook.
Be prepared for other relationships to change.
Be kind to yourself.
Here’s a closer look at each piece of divorce advice.
#1. Make sure you’re really ready for divorce.
When you tell your spouse you want a divorce, and especially when you actually file for divorce, you’re crossing a line that you can’t usually go back over. It’s like a set of dominoes – and once you push the first one over, you’re committed.
#2. Talk to a therapist.
Even if you’ve been thinking about divorce for a long time, you’ll most likely experience grief over the loss of your relationship. It’s a good idea to talk to a divorce therapist who’s trained in helping people cope with difficult situations.
#3. Take your kids to a therapist.
Your kids are seeing your divorce from a different angle, and they’ll most likely benefit from talking to a therapist, too. You can all see the same therapist – together and in separate sessions – to keep your family on the same page. Of all the divorce advice for women available, this may be one of the most valuable pieces.
Don’t leave the outcome of your divorce up to chance. Set goals and make a plan to reach them. While there’s no way to predict how a judge will rule in any case, you need a roadmap to get where you want to be.
#6. Shore up your support network.
Friends and family are a vital support network during divorce. Just be prepared for the fact that some people feel like divorce is “contagious” or that they won’t know what to say to you… and let them know just being there is enough.
#7. Commit to putting your children first.
You may be hurt, angry, afraid and upset – but no matter what, if you have children, they must come first in your divorce. That means doing what’s best for them, even if it doesn’t feel like doing what’s best for you. It also means being honest with yourself about what’s best for them, such as spending enough time with their other parent. This isn’t just divorce advice for women, either; it goes for men, too.
Before you even file for divorce, make sure you have copies of all your financial statements (and access to them in the future), your mortgage information, and other important documents.
When you and your spouse are able to find common ground on all the important issues, your divorce will be less painful (financially and emotionally) than it would be if you fought over everything. Commit to trying to negotiate with each other so you can both be reasonably satisfied with the outcome.
Remember that divorce is a means to an end, and it won’t last forever – even if it feels like it. During your divorce, you’ll have to focus on what really matters: your children, your life post-divorce, and being reasonably satisfied with the outcome. Some of the best divorce advice for women we can give is to stay focused on the goal throughout the entire process.
#11. Foster a good relationship between your kids and their other parent.
Your main responsibility is to your children, and it’s up to you to make sure you’re doing your part to foster healthy parent-child relationships… and that goes for you and their other parent. Kids whose parents try to drive wedges in their relationships have a harder time recovering – and a harder time trusting – than children whose parents make sure they know they’re loved and cared for on both sides of the aisle.
#12. Look at divorce like a business transaction.
Divorce is the legal dissolution of your marriage contract, so try your best to treat it that way. You’ll be emotional – everyone is – but remember that it’s a transaction between you and your spouse. Don’t try to use the courts for emotional justice, because you won’t find it there (and it could even backfire horribly).
Avoid putting any of the details of your divorce on Facebook – even if you’re asking a private group for advice. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t talk to your friends and family; you should absolutely do that. Just keep it off social media because it can come back to bite you later. (This isn’t just divorce advice for women. It goes for men, too.)
#14. Be prepared for other relationships to change.
When people find out that you’re divorcing, they might not know how to handle it – and you may even lose some friends you made as a couple. People often feel like they have to take sides, but that’s not always the case; in fact, some people, in an effort to avoid taking sides, will avoid being there for you or your spouse. A lot of people just don’t know what to say, or they’re afraid that divorce is somehow “contagious,” so you may experience uncomfortable distance between you and some of the people you trust.
#15. Be kind to yourself.
Divorce is rough – nobody can argue that. But remember: You don’t need to do everything perfectly. The house can get messy, you can cry, you can let the laundry go. Be kind to yourself and avoid beating yourself up over things. Remember, too, that you have to take care of your body by getting enough sleep, taking it easy on caffeine and alcohol, and getting enough exercise so your mind can be as sharp as possible when you’re making all these big decisions.
The adoption process in California varies based on the type of adoption you’re pursuing. For example, a stepparent who is adopting his or her spouse’s child will have to take different steps than a couple adopting a newborn will take – but generally, every adoption follows a similar course. Typically, the adoption process includes:
Most adoptions follow similar steps. Your attorney can give you case-specific guidance, but here’s a closer look at the most basic steps so you know what to expect.
#1. Finding an Adoption Attorney
For many people, the journey to growing a family begins with hiring an adoption attorney. Your attorney can walk you through the entire process, from start to finish, and she’ll answer your questions every step of the way.
Your attorney will fill out the court forms required by California law. The forms you need to file depend on the type of adoption you’re using. The most common types include stepparent or domestic partner adoptions, independent adoptions, agency adoptions and international adoptions. Each has its own requirements.
Your attorney will file all the necessary forms for you. Usually, they go to the court clerk in your county. (Don’t worry – your attorney will make sure that you have copies of everything.)
#4. Getting Consent From the Birth Parent or Parents, if Necessary
Sometimes birth parents relinquish custody of their children. When that happens, you don’t have to get their consent. However, if you’re adopting your stepchild or your domestic partner’s child, you will most likely have to get the child’s other parent’s or guardian’s consent.
You may still be able to adopt the child without the parent’s or guardian’s consent if:
The other birth parent has abandoned the child for more than a year, and he or she has not seen or spoken with the child or paid any child support
Your attorney serves the other birth parent with an Adoption Request form, which requires the other birth parent to show up in court on a specific date to object to the adoption
The judge in your case determines that your adoption is in the child’s best interest
#5. Being Interviewed and Submitting to an Investigation as Part of the Adoption Process in California
You’ll have to go through a home study, be interviewed by an investigator (often a social worker) and go through a criminal background investigation as part of the adoption process in California.
The home study is designed to ensure that you’re prepared to bring a child into your family, and the requirements might vary based on the type of adoption you’re pursuing. Additionally, you must agree to a fingerprint-based state and federal background check, and the government will check for your name in the Child Abuse Central Index. Some convictions will bar you from adoption, such as anything that requires you to register as a sex offender, infliction of injury on a spouse (or cohabitant, or parent of a child), or endangering a child.
#6. Getting a Court Date and Attending an Adoption Hearing
After the court receives a complete report from the investigator assigned to your case, you’ll get a court date for an adoption hearing. Your attorney will keep you updated if there are any changes, and she’ll go with you when you appear in court, as well.
At the adoption hearing, the judge will issue his or her decision. You must bring all the forms you have filled out (remember, your attorney will make sure you have plenty of copies). The child must also attend the hearing.
Do You Need to Talk to a Lawyer About the Adoption Process in California?
If you’re considering adoption, whether you’re going through an agency or adopting a stepchild or other relative, we may be able to help you. Call us at (209) 546-6246 to set up a consultation to talk about your case and get answers to all your questions today.
California adoption requirements are different from those in other states – and the laws in our state play an important role in your entire experience. If you’re considering adopting a child in California, you may want to consult with a Stockton, CA adoption attorney who can help.
California Adoption Requirements: What You Need to Know
If you want to adopt a child in California, you’ll have to follow the letter of the law. California adoption requirements involve nearly every aspect of the process, including who’s allowed to adopt a child, how much families can pay and how the legal paperwork becomes binding. Some of the most common requirements involve:
#1. California Adoption Requirements About the Adopter’s Age: How Old Do You Have to Be to Adopt a Child?
If you want to adopt a child, you must be at least 10 years older than the child you’re adopting. However, if you’re adopting a stepchild or another relative, you don’t have to meet this requirement.
#2. Criminal History Checks: A Mandatory Requirement
Every prospective adoptive parent must submit to a criminal background check. Some convictions are a permanent bar to adoption, while others are negotiable (and sometimes at the discretion of an adoption agency, if that’s the route you’re taking). You will be barred from adoption if you have been convicted of anything that requires you to register as a sex offender or endangering a child, as well as some other types of crimes. Your adoption attorney can help you understand how this law applies to you, as well.
You must undergo a home study investigation if you want to adopt a child in California. This adoption requirement exists so that you can prove that you can provide a stable, nurturing home to a child. Additionally, the social worker assigned to your case can help you understand what types of adoption opportunities might be best for your family, as well as answer your questions and help you prepare for the process.
During the home study investigation, you’ll have to:
Submit fingerprints
Undergo a physical examination
Attend adoption training classes
Complete at least one individual interview with a social worker
Complete an in-home visit and investigation with a social worker
#4. California Adoption Requirements on How Much You Can Pay a Birth Mother
California laws say that you can pay reasonable maternity-related medical costs for your baby’s birth mother. In some cases, you can provide money for expenses that are necessary for the birth mother or baby’s welfare or expenses that are directly related to the pregnancy. In some cases, birth mothers are allowed to receive money for:
Housing
Food
Basic utilities
Transportation
Maternity clothing
However, the birth mother must make a written request for payment and provide written receipts for any money you provide – and you’ll have to submit the receipts to the court before a judge can finalize your adoption.
#5. Consent for Adoption
Depending on your circumstances, you and your attorney may need to obtain consent from several people to go through with the adoption. You may need consent from:
The child’s living parents (both, if they are married or if the father is named on the child’s birth certificate)
The child’s custodial parent only, provided that the other parent has failed to communicate with and support the child for at least a year, or if the other parent fails to respond to notice of adoption proceedings
Your spouse, if you’re married
The child being adopted, provided the child is over the age of 12
Do You Need to Talk to a Lawyer About California Adoption Requirements?
These are only the most basic California adoption requirements – you may need to meet other requirements as well. If you have questions about adoption, we may be able to help.
Call us at (209) 546-6246 to set up a consultation to talk about your case and get answers to all your questions today.
The California divorce process, step by step, includes nine major components:
Preparing paperwork to file
Filing
Serving divorce papers
Responding to the divorce
Temporary orders
Financial disclosures
Discovery
Settlement
Trial
The California Divorce Process, Step by Step
While no two divorces are exactly alike, most California divorces follow the same series of events. Every step requires you, your spouse or your attorney to take different actions, so here’s a closer look at each.
#1. Preparing paperwork to file
For most people, the best choice is to work with a Stockton divorce attorney who can provide legal advice every step of the way. Preparing paperwork to file for divorce can be complicated, and you’ll need to gather up several pieces of documentation. You need:
Birth certificates
Pay stubs
Tax returns
Mortgage statements
Retirement account statements
Credit card bills and statements
Insurance policies and other documents
Other personal or financial documents, which your attorney can explain to you
#2. Filing
When your attorney has completed the summons and petition for your divorce, she’ll file it with the court system. If you have children from your current relationship, she’ll also file a special form that outlines their residences over the past 5 years.
#3. Serving divorce papers
Serving divorce papers simply means that you’re notifying your spouse that you’ve filed for divorce. (If your spouse has already filed, there’s a good chance that you’ve been served with divorce papers.) Your attorney will handle this part for you.
Your spouse will have a chance to respond to the divorce paperwork you filed – or, if your spouse filed, you’ll have a chance to respond. If the person who receives the papers doesn’t respond within 30 days, the divorce can move forward without his or her input.
#5. Temporary orders
Sometimes temporary orders are necessary. They’re orders the judge in your case makes, which are good until the divorce is final; sometimes these orders become permanent. Judges often issue temporary orders for things like:
You and your spouse are required to disclose your financial situations to the court during the divorce process. Because California is a community property state, and because some property is considered separate property (meaning that it belongs to only one of you), the courts need an accurate picture of your situation. You’ll have to provide documentation to back up your claims, which can include:
W-2s
Check stubs
Bank statements
Federal and state income tax returns
Titles and deeds
Retirement account statements
Credit card statements
Insurance policies
You may need other documentation as well. Your attorney will explain what you need.
#7. Discovery
Discovery is the legal method of getting the information you need from your spouse during the California divorce process. Your attorney will file a formal legal request and may ask your spouse to answer written questions – and your spouse will have to admit or deny the truth of a statement under penalty of perjury. Your attorney may also want to depose your spouse, which means he or she will have to give oral testimony under penalty of perjury.
#8. Settlement
You and your spouse will reach a settlement (you can reach a settlement without Step 7 if you both agree that you’ve provided all the necessary documentation) at some point during your divorce process. The settlement is the result of a give-and-take negotiation where you and your spouse find common ground on things like property division and child custody. Your settlement agreement will also include information on:
Child custody and visitation
Child and spousal support
Property division
How you’ll handle your debts
Your new marital status and, in some cases, a name change for one party
#9. Trial
Not all divorce cases end in a trial. In fact, you only have to go to trial if all your other settlement options have failed. Either you or your spouse can request a trial, but in some cases, the judge will set one even if neither of you asks.
The best way to keep your divorce out of court (other than to get a judge’s signature on your divorce paperwork) is to settle things with your spouse on your own. Trials can be time-consuming and expensive, and if you go to trial, your divorce will take much longer than it would if you settled.
Do You Need to Talk to an Attorney About the California Divorce Process, Step by Step?
We’ve helped many people in Stockton, and we can help you, too. Call us at (209) 546-6246 to set up a consultation to talk about your case and get answers to all your questions, including those about child custody and child support, property division and more.
If you’re divorcing your spouse in California, you’ll likely consider mediation – many people do. In fact, mediation is the smart choice when you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse just can’t see eye-to-eye. And in some cases, the courts actually order mediation to help people resolve disagreements (particularly when it comes to parenting plans for their children). Check out these 17 divorce mediation tips if you’re headed that way – you’ll find them tremendously helpful.
17 Divorce Mediation Tips You Need to Know Before You Start Mediation
Some of these tips may not apply to you – but read through each to determine which ones you can put into practice to make your entire experience with mediation go more smoothly.
1. Agree to come to the table in good faith. Mediation requires both you and your ex to decide that you’ll both do your best to find common ground – even if you don’t feel like getting along.
2. Do your homework, and ask your ex to do the same. Create a master list of all your assets and debts, and pull together records for all your income sources (both yours and your spouse’s).
3. Be realistic. Mediation is about finding common ground, not about bending your ex to your will (or about your ex bending you to his or her will), so don’t walk into it thinking that you’re going to “take it all.” Instead, expect to walk away reasonably satisfied with the outcome. That’s what mediation is designed for, so go into it with the right expectations.
4. Don’t be shy, but avoid making demands. Be prepared to say what you want from the divorce and back up your reasoning with facts. The mediator can help you and your ex come together based on facts when you can’t see eye-to-eye emotionally. (This is a key divorce mediation tip that many people miss. It’s really important, because you have to speak up for what you want!)
5. Put your kids first. Remember that although children are resilient, divorce is tough on them – and the things you ask for in mediation should be in their best interest.
6. Be comfortable with making your own decisions. Your mediator won’t tell you what to do; instead, he or she will present you with options after identifying and discussing issues.
7. Participate actively in the process. If you don’t actively participate, or worse, if you don’t cooperate, mediation won’t be successful. You’ll both have to put in some work and participate in give-and-take.
8. Stay flexible. Mediation is all about compromise, so skip the “my way or the highway” mentality and be ready to give up some things to gain others. If you can only implement a few of these divorce mediation tips, make sure this one is high on your priority list.
9. Know what you’re willing to give up before you begin. There are some things you’d like to get out of your divorce, but there are others that you could do without. Know what you want (and what you can give up) before you start mediation
10. Know your best alternatives. When you think about your agreements with your spouse, consider what your best scenario would be if you don’t get exactly what you want – and be ready to accept them if they’re presented. This requires pre-planning, so make sure you walk into your mediation with an idea of what you’re really willing to accept (and what’s worth fighting for).
11. Decide whether you’re bringing your attorney or flying solo. Your attorney can come with you if you wish, but that’s something you should discuss prior to your appointment; in some cases, it’s best if you go alone.
12. Don’t try to mediate if your spouse is abusive. If your spouse has been physically or verbally abusive, mediation may not be the best choice for you. Talk to your attorney about other options. Rather than divorce mediation tips, you likely need an alternative method.
13. Be honest. You have to be willing to come clean about what you have and what you want – otherwise, your mediation might be doomed from the start. You certainly can’t hide assets; doing so will get you into serious trouble in court.
14. Know that it’s okay to take a break. Mediation isn’t the most fun you’re going to have. In fact, it can be fairly difficult and even frustrating. It’s okay to tell the mediator you need to step outside to clear your head if things are getting too tough.
15. Know what your spouse is angling for. You know your spouse better than anyone else does, so when you go into mediation, you probably have a good idea about what he or she wants. It’s in your best interest to sit down and seriously think about what your spouse would like to get from mediation; that way, you can negotiate better.
16. Check your emotions at the door. It’s hard, but you have to look at mediation like a business negotiation – otherwise, you might not get very far.
17. Keep an open mind. You may really want to get your marital home in the divorce – but would you be okay if you didn’t get it? Be prepared to explore alternative solutions to get what you want (or to come close to getting what you want).
Do You Need to Talk to a Lawyer About Divorce and Mediation Tips?
If you’re contemplating divorce, or if your spouse has already filed, we can help you (and we can give you more divorce mediation tips if you need them). Call us right away at (209) 546-6870 or get in touch with us online to schedule a consultation.
If you’re a stay-at-home mom who’s facing divorce, you probably have a lot of questions. While most of them can be solved during a consultation with a Stockton divorce attorney, here’s a quick peek at a little divorce advice for stay-at-home moms.
Divorce Advice for Stay-at-Home Moms
Being a stay-at-home mom is wonderful – but it can be incredibly scary when you choose to (or when your spouse files for) divorce. When you don’t have your own source of income, or when you’re not sure what the job market holds for you, it can all seem overwhelming. However, you can follow these five tips to help make things easier on yourself:
Gather financial documents.
Find out what your assets are worth.
Get familiar with your credit score.
Plan to return to work.
Think about asking for alimony.
Let’s take a closer look at each of these so you can be as prepared as possible.
#1. Gather financial documents.
Pull together all the financial documents you have. One of the best pieces of divorce advice for stay-at-home moms is to keep records of everything – including things like:
Pay stubs
Loan and mortgage documents
Insurance policies
Bank statements
Investment account statements
W2s from previous years
Tax returns from previous years
When you have as many financial documents as you can get, keep them all organized in a folder. Later, if you choose to ask the court for alimony, you may need to provide proof of your family’s income – and your spouse may not be as truthful as you will.
Maybe you want to continue living in your marital home after the divorce. That’s fine, but no matter what you intend to do, you need to find out how much it’s worth. That’s because divorce is financially tough on many couples – and you may not be able to keep it. It’s often a good idea to get the house appraised before your divorce so you know how much it’ll be worth if you have to sell it, and so you can prepare to divide the cash or come up with the remainder of what you owe.
If you have other assets, you should also find out what they’re worth.
Use a site like CreditKarma to keep up with your credit score. You may need to apply for credit during or after your divorce, and the better your score is, the more likely you are to get favorable rates and terms. If there are things you need to fix on your credit report, now is the time to do it.
#4. Plan to return to work.
Another great piece of divorce advice for stay-at-home moms is to start planning to return to work. While a judge may award you alimony (commonly called spousal support), it’s not likely to last forever – and even if it would last forever, it may not be enough to support yourself in the lifestyle you want. A lot of stay-at-home moms end up going back to work during or after divorce, and you may be one of them. Brush up your resume and start looking at jobs that are available – and remember, even if they’re outside your field, they’re still worth considering when you really need to work.
#5. Think about asking for alimony.
You don’t have to ask the court for alimony, but your Stockton divorce attorney might suggest that you do. If the judge sees that you’ve been out of the workforce for a significant amount of time, and that you’re unlikely to be able to return to work right away because you need to get current on your skills, he or she may order your spouse to pay alimony. There are never any guarantees on how a judge will rule, but if you can show a need, the judge in your case may agree that you need – and deserve – spousal support.
If you’re thinking about divorce, or if your spouse has already filed, we may be able to help you. We’ll give you more specific divorce advice for stay-at-home moms, plus case-specific advice that helps you in your unique situation.