Divorce is one of the most stressful things you’ll ever go through – but if you’re like most people, you know that there are some things you shouldn’t do during the divorce. In fact, there are a few things you can do that will actually make your divorce more difficult. Here are five things not to do during divorce:
- Don’t dismiss the idea of mediation
- Don’t drain joint bank accounts or increase your debts
- Don’t involve your children
- Don’t settle just to get it over with
- Don’t have unrealistic expectations
5 Things Not to Do During Divorce
Don’t Dismiss the Idea of Mediation
Most people want to make it through divorce as painlessly as possible, and one way to do that is through mediation. A trained mediator can help you cut through the emotional issues that often hold up divorce so you can reach agreements with your spouse about important issues like child custody.
Don’t Drain Joint Bank Accounts or Increase Your Debts
Just like assets, the court will divide your debt during divorce – but if you rack up a significant amount of debt knowing that you’re going to divorce, or if you drain a joint bank account, you could end up in a lot of hot water. Before you make any major financial decisions, talk to your Stockton divorce attorney about what’s okay and what’s not.
Don’t Involve Your Children
Your children will want – and need – to know what’s going on, but experts suggest that you explain the situation in age-appropriate ways. Never, ever use your children as therapists; they love you and your spouse, and they don’t want to feel like they’re in the middle of your battle. Over-involving your kids, or telling them more than what they need to know, is the best way to permanently damage your parent-child relationships.
Don’t Settle Just to Get it Over With
The courts are here to ensure that marriages are dissolved fairly, and you’re entitled to your share of the assets from your divorce. You’re also entitled to see your children and spend uninterrupted quality time with them. Unfortunately, some people simply cave in to their spouses’ demands just to get the divorce over with faster – but that can be a huge mistake. Your attorney will fight for what’s right and fair to you (and your kids). You don’t have to give in just to get things over with.
Don’t Have Unrealistic Expectations
The courts aren’t going to take away everything your spouse owns because he or she cheated on you, or take away all his or her parental rights because you two can’t get along, so don’t expect that to happen. Instead, start your divorce with realistic expectations so you can begin planning for a successful future on your own. If you’re not sure what’s feasible, talk to your lawyer; she’ll make sure you understand the most likely outcomes.
Are You Thinking About Divorce?
We can answer your questions about whether you’ll be required to pay or entitled to receive spousal support, how to figure out child custody and the division of property, as well as any other questions you may have or refer you to a therapist focusing on divorce issues.
Call us at (209) 546-6246 or contact us online to schedule an appointment with an attorney. We may be able to help you.